Abi: Change. [30/30]

There are so many people and events worth remembering in my life that I would love to post about. Everyone I met had reason to me, and inspired me in one way or another… but today, to end this challenge (well, to end it in the terms of this, but never in the reality of remembering myself) I thought I would focus a little on the core of the change into my adult life: John.

The day I met him was the day my life started to move in an entirely new direction, one I never had foreseen.

The day I first met him was in my apartment. My current boyfriend, Paul, was over at the time. Paul and I were okay, but the relationship wasn’t quite right… we were okay when we were alone, but when there were other people I was forgot. I know I am usually timid, and I tend to be very soft spoken in groups, but it’s like he literally forgot I existed… so things were already shredding on that line, though it wasn’t until I met John that it was clear I couldn’t love Paul…
Amariah had brought John over. He was a co-worker, and they had become fast friends (with John, that’s easy, he’s an outgoing person who will talk to anyone). Paul, of course, was completely engaged with talking to everyone but me, so I remember sitting in the area between my desk and book shelf and chewing on the antenna of Invader Zim plushie and pretty much just listening to the conversations. I think Paul was playing something on my Playstation, I believe it was Castlevania. He was showing it off to John… Amariah I think had seen it before, and maybe even played it before.

I remember John had longer hair, reminding me of someone from an 80’s band like Foreigner or something… He had a very familiar face, as well… and an air of confidence.
I know that in the course of the night he tried to tell me I should never go to Ireland, because of my accent… It never made much sense to me why he said it, still doesn’t. I know I had an accent that people asked about, something slightly British I guess…

I recall after John and Amariah left, Paul and I were taking a walk around the apartment complex in the dark, which was a very common event for us. I asked Paul if he thought John hated me, because his comment made me very hurt for whatever reason… okay, the real reason was I wanted ever so much to be liked my John. I honestly, truly, wanted him in my life… It was, I think, love at first sight…

That night the seeds of change were planted.